Fleet Access

Having looked out for and missed, the the boundary of the Fleet Nature Reserve - or what ever it's called, we were hauled over by THE WARDEN.


He offered 

1. NO IDENTIFICATION!
2. NO EXPLANATION AS TO WHY WE SHOULD LEAVE
3. A DIRECTIVE TO REMOVE OURSELVES FROM THE AREA
4. AN ADMISSION THAT WE WERE BEING ENVIRONMENTALLY FRIENDLY
5. AN INSISTENCE THAT WE HAD TRANSGRESSED THE ROW OF WARNING SIGNS ON LAND AND WATER - that may have been damaged over last winter (5 months ago), but, he insisted, "were there yesterday". 
6. WE HAD NO RIGHT OF INGRESS OR EGRESS AT ANY POINT ON THE FLEET.

Warning posts with signs on them? We had seen none. He insisted that they were there. 

How the hell could we not see them - WE WERE LOOKING OUT FOR THEM!! We said we'd take a look on our return and let him know. HE GAVE US THE WRONG WEB ADDRESS!!!!! How professional of him - perhaps he's a volunteer, or was hoping we'd go away: for good?

Here then, are the posts we found between the first high water beach on the Chesil side,where we met the warden and the lifeboat house also on the Chesil side. They are all within a VERY EASY ROW of the beach he was on. He could have wandered down with us to take a look. He didn't bother. 


Where are these signs that were there YESTERDAY?





Here is the only sign that could be seen from the Chesil ( interesting/inaccessible) side of the Fleet. It is weathered to a point of destruction. There is nothing to read here. Probably hasn't been FOR YEARS. YESTERDAY MY ARSE!

 We did vaguely notice this old, rickety fence running up the beach, it's in line with this tilting post next to MeWally. The worn sign is the first on on the beach; see how it stands out - shouting it's information - NOT.

MeWally is looking at the continuation of these posts with information on them. Can't see them? No, and that's the problem. The distant white specks are swans. That's how we knew we were near the reserved area. The posts are there, but without an out board motor, why would anyone go to the other side of the Fleet to see why they're there. We didn't go to all that trouble for all the other posts in the FLeet!

Oh look, it's another post!





And here's another, along with a beach full of detritus. A fence is NO DEFENCE. One organisations fence is another tourists row of rubbish.

Good garden peas, could this be more posts? So many posts, so little time!

Looking landward, oh yeh, that'll be a post then. Surprise!

Hard to see, I know, but this one has a bird on it; is that legal, or will it topple your delicate eco system. when is an intruder not an intruder?


Here ends the post roll. 


What of the signage available to us thick tourists?

No access/egress info/agreement here. 

 The detail implies that unmotorised craft can launch. We, because we're long term paddlers know about access; it's ground into us, so we stayed within the law - strictly. We stepped from East Fleet land into our floating boats. In my book that makes it legal - or at least, too close to call in legal terms. 

 I would suggest that you contact the organisations above if you have any concerns with the quality of the information imparted to your water sporting tourists. 


A final few pointers:


If you can't afford to maintain your boundary markers, I suggest you find a way of raising funds.
Why not, at decent high tides, around springs, take people out in OC's and educate them. They'd pay good money for the privilege. Your precious reserve would be appreciated, protected, and funded. You never know, you may even earn bequests, the holy grail of all charitable trusts. You would also provide work for local people. I know, it sounds exhausting. There are people out there who would jump at the chance to make this paradigm shift. Use them.


Or you could stay as you are, insular, alienated, poor in every sense, isolated within your community and feeding duff information to the one or two little boats that drift onto your 'pond' (I would say 'pill') during a summer.


Rules aren't made to be broken, they're made to make us think WHY?

Riches Farm - Saturday 30.7.11

Here we are then, at Richs' Farm for a week of sun, sea and fun with friends.

What I don't understand is .....

why Richs' house has a pink moustache???

A wander after our first meal in our little cottage (cowshed, I reckon)

reveals the FLEET, behind CHESSIL BEACH, to be an area of beguiling beauty. 

CLICK HERE to begin enjoying a week of shots from last years visit.

Sony Ipants

I have an Ipod thingy. It's silver, quite large and, now my ears have grown accustomed to the earphones, a great way to help the gardening day pass even more enjoyably.

You can see the problem, I guess.

But NO, you can't. 

Not really. 

These are the new earphones that arrived 3 days ago.

YES - 3 DAYS AGO.

In my book that's TOTAL PANTS.

ITHINK the IPEOPLE need to appreciate that I'M IRATE.

All fixed now - GAFFER TAPE - looks pants IKNOW, though cheaper than a new set every three days, ISAY.

Toby Carvery - Thursday 5.5.11

On account of being bloody ancient and finally admitting she's decrepit, Bristol Brenda wanted to check out a bungalow she'd seen advertised. It was something to do for a couple of hours and meant we could natter in the car; on the journey. We headed to CLUTTON. The bungalow was OK-ish; food for thought, we thought. Now it was time to enjoy a late pub lunch; food for dorks, as all the pubs had stopped serving lunches. Well it was about 3.00pm! Eventually we bumbled across a TOBY CARVERY. In we drove - happy day.

Apart from 2 tables of ashen, cadaverous customers, the place was empty, but we had to WAIT TO BE SEATED! 

The waitress asked if we'd like to order our drinks.

"Not yet, thanks," said Brenda.

"Yes. If I could just take your drinks order," said the girl, fluttering her note pad.

"Oh, um, well I don't know. What do you want Missy?" Asked Brenda.

"Oh I don't know, I'm peckish. What's on the menu?" Said I.

"I need to take your drinks order, if you wouldn't mind," She repeated.

"We'd like a moment to get our breath back. Would you mind giving us a moment?" Brenda panted.

"I need to take your drinks order now, because I'm going out for 5 minutes and you'll have to wait for me to come back," The waitress said decisively.

We placed our drinks order.

Things spiral down hill after this.

With drinks in place - a SPRITE for Brenda, because they had no 7up and a cup of ordinary tea for me because they had no Earl Grey - we studied the menu.

Nothing to eat????

We called the girl over, as I fished out the teabag from the mug of tepid water (presentation is nothing here) and queried the menu. Were we missing something?

"Have you seen our range of starters?" She asked us.

Blank looks in return. She removed the menu from my hands and turned it over; pictures of desserts. "This is the desserts side," I said. She pointed to a few lines above the temptingly sweet treats. "Ahhh, starters," I said, "Thank you." And wondered why they've listed the starters between the main course and the desserts.

Truth is there wasn't much on this list either. You have to bear in mind that all we wanted was a snack and I'm a veggy. We called her over again and explained that we fancied a snack of some kind. 

"This is a carvery madam," she said to me.

"A what?" Said Brenda.

"A carvery," I said a bit louder, all the better for her to hear me. She looked puzzled, mostly, I think for effect, so I went along with her. "You know, a buffet," I added.

"It's a carvery, not a buffet," said the waitress. I said my 'buffet' bit again and she said her 'carvery' bit again. We went around this loop for about 4 times, until I said, "What's the difference then?" That put a stop to it.

SWEET.

The waitress turned the conversation on a sixpence, "If you want a snack you should be in the bar."

"What? You sat us here. Are you saying we have to sit somewhere else?"

She actually looked non-plussed. "What if we get there and don't like anything on the menu, we'll have to come back here?" I said. Brenda was doubled up with laughter, or perhaps it was hunger. "Could you bring us a bar menu?" The waitress looked confused, Brenda snorted a stifled laugh. 

"I don't know."Said our waitress, as she looked around for inspiration.

"Come on," Said Brenda, "The place is almost empty. And besides You can see I have trouble walking." she tapped the handle of her walking stick.  "Come on, bring us a bar menu." 

And off went our girl, hot foot to the bar, a whole 3 or 4 metres away.

We ordered. The food arrived and was fine. EXCEPT...... the bread was stale and the butter was marge.

"Go on, get her back over." Whispered Brenda with a smirk. And I did.

According to 'her' the bread was crusty - well that's one way of putting it - and the the marge was swapped for the advertised butter without question. Sadly the butter was so hard that Brenda couldn't spread it. It sat in pea sized lumps on the surface of her dry bread; nice.

It has to be said that she was the most long suffering waitress ever, and we were the most long suffering customers. 

FUN THOUGH

  

In A Jam - Thursday 31.3.11

Don't often feel moved to have a whinge, but, well, REALLY : |

There was a traffic jam today. The motor scooter that had over taken me got quite well ahead of me, on the pavement.

The next thing I knew was that it was going backwards. The scooter couldn't get past the warning signs. How nice of the work team to block the pavement so that all but the fit and young - unless they're pushing a baby around, can get by. The scooter driver had to get onto the road, with its' ramps and very rough surface and trickle to the next dip in the pavement ... where ever that might be.

IT MAKES ME MAD WHENEVER THE CAR'S THE STAR.

The reason for the long queue, OVER HALF AN HOUR? This stop go board. 

We were hungry when we got to Poole so, first up; eat. 


The food was horrible. 


How can any business RUIN A SALAD?? The hotel eatery managed to. That 'catsick' you can see left on the side of the plate, tasted of chip fat, and crunched exactly like sugar lumps. The dressing was mega sweet, salty and tasted of chemically produced flavourings - it had never seen any honey OR ginger - EVER - IMO. If I closed my eyes it tasted exactly as if the SALAD was DRIZZLED WITH a dressing of OLD CHIP FAT and sprinkled with SUGAR LUMPS and SALT. I couldn't taste the fresh, crisp ingredients.

WHAT THE HELL KIND OF CHEF IS EMPLOYED AT THE 

HOLES BAY PREMIER INN, POOLE, DORSET?

It's a strange place, because.......


The next morning we had booked to have brekky there. We entered with great trepidation. Once again, really great staff, oh, but what of that scary food?


It was REALLY GOOD!


The veggie sausages were a TRULY BRAVE SHOUT; no pretend meat here, rather Glamorgan style instead, cooked really nicely. Way better than we're often offered in, so say, smart hotels. A TOP EFFORT.


WHAT A LOVELY SURPRISE! : )

Messages

Just to let you know - 

YOU CAN NOW LEAVE MESSAGES  AFTER MY BLOGS - if you feel the need.

Sadly, at some point, the message facility was disabled - don't ask me how, but it was. It's now fixed. If it isn't, let me know.

OH YEH, GOOD POINT, YOU WONT BE ABLE TO ....... LOL : )